Earl's Science Essays

I love science. Science is the secret to my success. I don't have a lot of smarts, but even a dunderhead like me can apply the Scientific Method. In my spare time, I read science journals, like Garage Tinkerer, Popular Explosions, Tin-Can Robots, and Dangerous Electronics. But reading these journals isn't what makes me a scientist. I just read them to keep up with cutting-edge research. No, the thing that makes me a scientist is the fact that I use the Scientific Method. And if I can be a scientist, ANYBODY can be a scientist! The Scientific Method is for EVERYBODY! So don't think that scientists are an elite bunch of snobs with secret handshakes who think they're smarter than everybody else and have all the answers. No way! Science is for everybody!

So since I love science so much, I wanted to devote part of my web site to doing my very small, humble part in following in the footsteps of one of my heroes, Carl Sagan, who dedicated his life to popularizing science and critical thinking. I know my contribution is meager, but it's very heartfelt.

The essays below are my own creation. I picked topics that I thought would be provocative and a lot of fun, but I alone am responsible for the contents. As a true scientist, I'm always willing to be convinced I'm wrong. So if you think I'm wrong about anything, you're welcome to convince me. Just send me a note telling me what you think.

Sorry for the long introduction. Now that it's over with, just click on a topic to learn more about it!

How to Build a Time Machine, and Stuff
In this essay, I'll teach you how to build a Time Machine! For real! (Good luck getting the raw materials and tools, though.)

How to Transport Matter Better Than They Do on TV, and Stuff
In this essay, I talk about ways to transport matter. I think I've come up with a way that is WAY better than they do on that famous TV show. (Trouble is, my new way may make the sun go out. Oh, well.)

On Chimpanzees, Typewriters, Shakespeare, and Stuff
Will an infinite number of chimpanzees typing randomly on an infinite number of typewriters for an infinite amount of time produce the complete works of Shakespeare? Even though everyone seems to believe this is the case, I wouldn't bet on it.

Ghosts are For Real! No, Really! (and Stuff)
In this essay, I talk about how ghosts REALLY EXIST. And not just exist, but Scientifically exist at that! (Remember, though, that this is REAL SCIENCE, so it's probably not what you normally think of when you think of ghosts.)

How long is a Day and Stuff?
How long does it take for the Earth to rotate 360 degrees, which is a full circle? The answer may surprise you. (Surprising Hint: It's NOT 24 hours! BOOM! Take THAT, Jack Bauer!) The connection between Earth and its sky is a very complicated thing.

How to Violate the Law of Conservation of Energy, and Stuff
Violating the Law of Conservation of Energy is even more difficult than building a Time Machine, but it's not impossible. Don't believe it? Then follow my formula to see how it's done!

Is There a Theory of Everything, and Stuff?
Many scientists devote their entire careers to searching for the Theory of Everything. Why? And what makes scientists so presumptuous to think that a Theory of Everything even exists?

Why the Expansion of the Universe is Accelerating, and Stuff
The acceleration of the expansion of the Universe is, perhaps, the most mind-boggling phenomenon ever observed in astronomy. Why is the expansion of the Universe accelerating? I have a theory that will blow your mind!

I'm just getting started, so other essays are coming soon. As always, I'm happy to hear your thoughts.

And don't forget that the very same brain that thought up all this science stuff could be put to work fixing your TV or air conditioner. Just give me a call, and me and my science-type brain will be there in no time, in just seven working days!